Hello, my name is Sam Ruby, and I'm not afraid to
admit that I read Shelley Power's weblog (Hi
Sam!)
Speaking of what people are afraid to admit, apparently a large
number of people prefer not to cry in public. Some of the
male of the species say that it's because it is not perceived as
masculine to do so. Some of the female of the species say
that it's because it is perceived as too feminine to do so.
I believe that in most cases, it is because the person does not
wish to appear vulnerable (or perhaps, in Shelley's case, exploitative).
Unfortunately, the reasons people state for this behavior
perpetuate the myth that the female gender is the weaker sex.
Those that believe that the female is the weaker sex have not
met my wife. I can guarantee that those who are reading this
weblog and have met my wife have a knowing smile on their faces
right now. For the rest, let me describe a shirt that she
often wears. It has a snarling cat on it. The caption
reads "don't mess with me, I draw blood".
It is not an idle threat.
I read Shelley's blog. Hers, yours, Joshua Allen's and Joel Spolsky's are probably the four I read with any regularity that I consistently like.
However I do think she takes blogging too seriously and may be too quick to play the victim.
Actually, the first posting that Sam linked to was one I pulled. But I forgot that the postings aren't necessarily deleted. I should have known if anyone could ferret it out, it would be Sam. The man has eyes in the back of his weblog.
Dare, I do agree with you -- I take weblogging too seriously. Need to spend time on photography and hiking more. Or focus more on my current projects. (Fun new toys for good girls and boys.). But I am concerned that I'm perceived as playing the victim too frequently. I appreciate this feedback, very much. It's good food for thought, and will keep this in mind in future postings.
My uncle, who <i>is</i> a sexist (as we all are) says that the myth that men are the hunters of our species is incorrect. Women are the hunters.
Another friend who will remain nameless says that men and women tend to have different common character flaws. Women tend to be mean. Men tend to be clueless.
I'd like to point out that to not cry, in public or private, needn't be due to not wanting to be less "masculine" or "vulnerable". Some people simply don't let people's opinions or actions affect them on that level.
Not crying needn't be because one has problems handling or showing ones true emotions, sometimes it's because ones emotions aren't affected at all.
I can't speak for others. Would I be offended by tasteful adverts on other pages? Heck no. Would I consider putting such a link on my page? Not yet. I've had people offer to "exchange links". I've had people offer to send me stuff if I would mentio...
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